After six weeks of break, it's bound to be a difficult transition.
One of the most wonderful aspects of DU is its enormous Winter Break. Students are freed from all classes before Thanksgiving and don’t come back until after New Year’s.
Those six weeks flew by much faster than I thought they would. I didn’t write much during that time, mainly because it was so wonderful. See, when I write, it’s mostly because I’m holding in some unbeatable angst or energy. I didn’t have much of that over break, so…why would I write?
I realize that’s a terrible excuse.
Anyways, after weeks of sleeping and reading and holiday parties, I’ve finally had to confront the sad reality that DU does exist. I have to start doing that awful class thing again.
School’s not actually all that bad. The worst part of it is probably just waking up in the morning. Once that’s over, the rest of my day is usually quite nice. But then I have to stay up late reading boring textbooks when I’d rather be watching a movie.
But really, I do have to admit I’m kind of glad to be back in school. It keeps me very busy, and even though I’m easily stressed, I thrive on being busy.
Plus, now I’m out, about, and walking more. Walking across campus, it turns out, does wonders in making me feel less like a worthless fat-ass. With holiday cookies and chocolate lying around everywhere tempting me relentlessly, I’ve been lugging around a depressing amount of holiday weight. So now, I’ve got to say, Thank God for that interminable walk to my car every day. At this point, it’s probably saving my life.
One thing about college though—it still makes me really nervous. I’m an absolute wreck when it comes to meeting new people. Well, actually, meeting them isn’t the problem. Making acquaintances is quite easy. It’s actually liking, and even more so, trusting them that I find to be obscenely difficult.
I’ve discovered that in new groups of people, I become extremely judgmental. I made the assumption today that my professor was inept because she used the words ‘like’ and ‘lovely’ more often than necessary. I also came to the conclusion that I don’t really like white girls (which for me is a completely ridiculous thing to say, for obvious reasons). I was mad at one of my classmates with a tired face and messy hair for being a slob, even when my own hair looked like it had recently survived a tornado or two.
So I’m not exactly the greatest people person. I’d like to become a little more personable around new people, and I may try to do that. It’s just not very easy. I’m a firm believer that the best way to make real friends is to not try to do so – to simply be one’s self. And this is me: sitting in the corner, not wanting to be bothered.
It’s amazing I have any friends at all, isn’t it?
The thing is, I love people (for the most part, anyways). I just have a terrible time interacting with them.
Those six weeks flew by much faster than I thought they would. I didn’t write much during that time, mainly because it was so wonderful. See, when I write, it’s mostly because I’m holding in some unbeatable angst or energy. I didn’t have much of that over break, so…why would I write?
I realize that’s a terrible excuse.
Anyways, after weeks of sleeping and reading and holiday parties, I’ve finally had to confront the sad reality that DU does exist. I have to start doing that awful class thing again.
School’s not actually all that bad. The worst part of it is probably just waking up in the morning. Once that’s over, the rest of my day is usually quite nice. But then I have to stay up late reading boring textbooks when I’d rather be watching a movie.
But really, I do have to admit I’m kind of glad to be back in school. It keeps me very busy, and even though I’m easily stressed, I thrive on being busy.
Plus, now I’m out, about, and walking more. Walking across campus, it turns out, does wonders in making me feel less like a worthless fat-ass. With holiday cookies and chocolate lying around everywhere tempting me relentlessly, I’ve been lugging around a depressing amount of holiday weight. So now, I’ve got to say, Thank God for that interminable walk to my car every day. At this point, it’s probably saving my life.
One thing about college though—it still makes me really nervous. I’m an absolute wreck when it comes to meeting new people. Well, actually, meeting them isn’t the problem. Making acquaintances is quite easy. It’s actually liking, and even more so, trusting them that I find to be obscenely difficult.
I’ve discovered that in new groups of people, I become extremely judgmental. I made the assumption today that my professor was inept because she used the words ‘like’ and ‘lovely’ more often than necessary. I also came to the conclusion that I don’t really like white girls (which for me is a completely ridiculous thing to say, for obvious reasons). I was mad at one of my classmates with a tired face and messy hair for being a slob, even when my own hair looked like it had recently survived a tornado or two.
So I’m not exactly the greatest people person. I’d like to become a little more personable around new people, and I may try to do that. It’s just not very easy. I’m a firm believer that the best way to make real friends is to not try to do so – to simply be one’s self. And this is me: sitting in the corner, not wanting to be bothered.
It’s amazing I have any friends at all, isn’t it?
The thing is, I love people (for the most part, anyways). I just have a terrible time interacting with them.
2 comments:
Good post today, I love your description of trepidation with new frienships. Oh and being one's self is absolutely the best way to be!
Yah, it seems like the semester takes an eternity, but the break flashes by in the blink of an eye. Lol, I think it should be illegal to do anything before 11 AM. :p
You crack me up Emily, you don't like white girls? hahahahaa. Oh man. This made my day :)
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