I commented recently, "Sometimes I just step back and look at my life. And then I see that I am so fucked up. I'm eighteen miles away from normal."
I was with one of my best high school friends at a Village Inn at 10PM, sipping coffee and eating breakfast for dinner. He just looked at me and asked, "Well, who's normal?" and I sat there staring at him for a while.
Life isn't exactly about being normal. Or fitting in. There's not a damn person on this earth who 'fits in' with anything, because there's not anything to fit in to! What kind of human should strive to fit into human made standards?
Let's face it: We're all confused. Is there anyone alive who doesn't feel thoroughly lost in at least one aspect of their life? That's what's normal -- nobody is.
A significant part of being human is being clueless. Or confused. Or scared. And yeah, kind of fucked up. I'm pretty sure we're all that way.
And while that's certainly not ideal .. In some strange way, it kind of is. It's one big unifying factor. I suffer. My friends suffer. The guy across the street suffers. There are as many different pains as there are people on this planet, and with that, who can really be "normal?"
There's no solution to this. There's no formula for complete sense, no way of finding instant nirvana. To phrase it simply, shit happens.
But ... it can be comforting to know that every person around you is probably sorting through just as much crap as you are. You're not the only one who isn't normal.
So, maybe we should just disregard the entire concept of normalcy. Maybe the best thing to do is to simply help each other out through the chaos.
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2 comments:
I think you're right. There really is no such thing as being normal. Besides if everyone was normal it would be pretty boring. I think that's what makes life more interesting, the lack of normalcy.
Unfortunately, society tries to paint an image of what it means to be normal and the misconception that it is possible to be "normal". Which makes me wonder about how far society will go to normalize life.
The post was a good how-to.
There is a note of sentimental defeatism in your post.
While true, it may not bare up to closer scrutiny. Then again, closer scrutiny may not be what you were after when you posted.
What a long winded preface to say that we’re all in the same boat my friend. If ever you discover a person who says they have reached all their goals or achieved success in a final form – you will have met the consummate liar.
The point is that we’re all fucked up. It doesn’t get better. Your ability to accept it and roll with the punches is measured as maturity. There is never a point when you get to say “I have arrived” at normal.
You shared great insight in asking the question “What is normal?” Normal, from my understanding, is a moving target designed by people I don’t know and don’t like and have no desire to emulate.
That all being said, a secret I choose to disclose: I have an unhealthy hatred for the word ‘weird’. Perhaps because of the usual suspects, like I’ve heard it a lot in my life, perhaps not. Maybe it’s just because I never really accepted the validity of the whole concept of normal. Who knows?
PEACE!
J.R.
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